Give Unto Me
by Lightseeker
Summary: J/I. Post "The Telling".


Title: Give unto me Rating: There's a bit of smut in it near the end. Tame smut nonetheless, but you've been warned. The parts of the story without the smut in it is rated PG-13. Timeline: Post "The Telling" Disclaimer: I don't own the characters, they belong to the brilliant mind that created them (JJ), Bad Robot and Touchstone Television. Notes: I've borrowed the title for this story from a song by Evanescence. Although I've written stories for other fandoms, this is my first piece of Alias fan fiction. Plus, since I'm somewhat of a Jack & Irina shipper I decided to write a story them.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Give unto me your troubles  
  
I'll endure your suffering  
  
Place onto me your burden  
  
I'll drink your deadly poison  
  
Jack sat on the floor of his living room and leaned back against the couch behind him. On the table in front of him lay an opened photo album and next to it stood an half empty bottle of scotch. He couldn't even remember how long he had been sitting there, seeing as all notion of time had somehow temporarily escaped him. Jack hadn't bothered to turn on the lights when the daylight outside had been replaced by the darkness of night. He vaguely remembered hearing the phone ringing at least a couple of different times before the caller had apparantly given up hope of ever reaching him. It wasn't exactly like he was in the mood for talking to anybody anyway and if it really had been that important they would simply have to call him again.  
  
Jack stared at at the pages of the photo album.  
  
He knew precisely which pictures he was looking at despite the fact that he was not able to see them in his pitch black surroundings. They were pictures of a happier time in his life. Pictures of the Bristow family, pictures of him and Laura, but mostly pictures of Sydney. After Laura's death and after he had been in solitary for six months he had given his daughter the album so that she had something to remember her mother by. At that time he felt that he could not destroy Sydney's world by telling her the truth about her mother.  
  
He could not tell his daughter that her mother was not the wonderful person Sydney believed her to be. That the woman he married was not the wonderful person Jack thought she had been. Laura Bristow had never been real and was instead the creation of a female KGB agent sent by Russia to steal top- secret information from him. His world and his life might have been shattered by that revelation, but he had not allowed the same thing to happen to Sydney.  
  
He had intended to hate Irina Derevko with every fibre of his being, but the funny thing was that despite his best efforts he could not do so. Instead of hating her he had actually started hating himself for having been such a fool, for having been played so easily by her. That's when he had started to unravel. He had tried to dull his pain by taking refuge into drinking alcohol. It had started small. It always does. Just one drink to forget it all.  
  
One little drink.  
  
Jack chuckled softly as he grabbed hold of the bottle on the table. It hadn't helped him back then and he knew that it wouldn't help him now. As tempting as it was, this time he would have to try to resist the temptation to live in a state of continued numbness and disconnection from a reality he would rather not face.  
  
One little drink.  
  
Sydney was the one who saved him. He had become reckless and had taken unnecessary risks after he had started drinking. One day a mission had gone awry and he had found himself severely wounded and wondering if he was going to survive to see the next day. The thought of Sydney was what had kept him going, kept him fighting for his life. He couldn't bear the thought of leaving her behind without anyone to care for her. She had not deserved to lose the only parent she still had left in her life.  
  
However, Sydney wasn't there to save him now.  
  
As Jack placed the bottle back on the table, his attention was suddenly drawn to one of the far corners of his living room. It was then that he noticed the figure standing in the hallway, observing him from a safe distance.  
  
" I don't remember giving you the key to my house," Jack spoke coldly, quickly closing the photo album shut. He should have known she would come to him. Somehow she always managed to show up when he least expected her to." What the hell do you think you are doing here anyway, Irina?"  
  
" You weren't answering your phone, Jack. I have some important information I needed to share with you," Irina Derevko countered. She wasn't going to tell him that she had been observing him for the past four days and that she was quite worried about him. It hadn't been easy to watch him suffer without being able to touch him or speak to him, because she had needed to make sure that no one knew she had entered the country before contacting Jack.  
  
"How long have you been standing there?"  
  
" Long enough," Irina replied softly as her gaze settled on the bottle of scotch.  
  
" Remind me to change the locks next time! Those things are supposed to keep unwanted elements out of one's house," Jack spat as he got up from the floor and faced her. She had caught him at a vulnerable moment and the only reaction he could think of was to lash out at her. He didn't want her to see him like this. He didn't want or need her pity.  
  
" Damn it, Jack! I don't want to see you wallow in selfpity," She yelled back at him in frustration. He looked terrible. Irina wondered if he had even managed to get some sleep during the past couple of weeks. It was hard for her to see him like this, so unlike the man she remembered from when they were younger. Had he been like this after he had found out the truth about her?  
  
"Or what, Irina?!" The words had left his mouth before he had even noticed it. It was more or less an automatic defense mechanism he had developed over the years. He had gotten very talented at keeping people at a distance, even though it was actually the last thing he wanted to. It was a way of protecting himself from getting hurt. Could she see that despite his demeanor he was actually almost begging for her to stay with him? He just couldn't bring himself to ask her. Begging wasn't something that Jack Bristow did. He did have his pride after all. The truth of the matter was that he was too afraid that she would leave him again. Leave him like she always seemed to do.  
  
Irina sighed as she stepped into the living room. He was being foolish if he thought that she was going to give up on him that easily. " Have you managed to eat something tonight, Jack?"  
  
Jack blinked a couple of times before her question finally registered. He hadn't expected her to make this move. It was a good question, but his mind was a total blank. He couldn't even say for certain if he had eaten anything at all today. " Eat? I don't think so. I can't remember..."  
  
" Are you hungry?"  
  
He shook his head as he sat down on the couch and ran his fingers through his hair.  
  
" Jack, you need to eat something," Irina walked over to the phone and picked it up. He needed to eat and she knew exactly what to order for him. She had memorized the number of the chinese restaurant where he usually ordered his food from. Irina had gone to great lenghts to assure that she was able to keep tabs on her husband after Panama. It had surprised her during her incarceration to learn things she had not known about him. He had after all managed to surprise her with the Madagascar incident. Jack Bristow was not a man one should underestimate and Madagascar had taught her a painful lesson.  
  
In a way she had been so desperate to reconnect with him after all those years, that she blinded herself to the possibility that the man she had loved no longer even existed. She had not wanted to see or admit that she bore responsibility for it, because it would destroy her. However, deep down inside she had always known that her betrayal would very likely scar the man she loved more than anything. She had buried it deep within her consciousness, because she needed to cling to those precious memories of Jack and Sydney in order to survive.  
  
To the outside world it seemed like Jack Bristow had just been a mere assigment she had endured for the love of Mother Russia. She had called Jack a fool during her debriefing by Khasinau, but in the end the true fools had been those she had managed to mislead by saying such a thing. Her superiors believed that she had successfully played Jack for a fool and never even realized that they were the ones who were being played for a fool instead. One could not say that Irina Derevko was not good or convincing at what she did.  
  
She remembered the satisfaction she felt surging through her entire body as she pulled the trigger and shot Khasinau. The dumbfounded expression on his face had been priceless and one she would savour for eternity. Khasinau had never expected her to kill him. The fool had never even seen it coming. If it had been up to her she would have already killed him when one of her operatives had handed the bible of her organisation over to him, but unfortunately the arrival of the CIA had prevented it.  
  
It had also been frustrating to finally see her daughter after twenty years and be close enough to touch her, but not being able to because Cuvee was watching. If she ever crossed paths with him again she would also not hesitate to pull the trigger. The look on Jack's face as Cuvee was taunting him was something she would never be able to forget. She had a role to play and had to make it believable for Cuvee, but unfortunately playing along with Cuvee inadvertently also meant hurting Jack. It should have dawned on Cuvee that it was actually quite possible to for her to fall in love with a man like Jack.  
  
The only thing she was grateful to Cuvee for was the fact that he had chosen Jack as the CIA officer she was supposed to seduce. Without Cuvee she would have never had the opportunity to meet Jack Bristow and fall in love with him. Cuvee thought that he knew her, but the truth was that he never really did. The only one who had actually known her was Jack. She had shown him who she really was. The truth was that Laura Bristow was the same person as Irina Derevko.  
  
He might not have believed it at first, but she had been trying to make Jack see it and it seemed like it slowly starting to work. She had an idea about why he had lashed out at her earlier. He had not wanted her to see him like this. Jack was wrong if he thought that she would take advantage of the fragile state he was currently him. Irina had sensed that despite the way he acted, he might actually have wanted her to stay.  
  
" Don't, Irina. I'm not in the mood for chinese take out. I believe that I still might have some edible things laying around in my refridgerator," Jack stated as he looked up at Irina. " If you're hungry you can grab something to eat, but don't bother getting anything for me. I don't think I can stomach food at the moment."  
  
Irina reluctantly nodded as she put the phone back. She hated it when he was being stubborn. It did not become him at all. Sydney's disappearance had hit him hard, but did he realize that she was hurting as much as he was? Did he wanted to see it? Irina had known that something was going to happen to Sydney and that it would to take her daughter away from her. She had spend numerous years of her life trying to find a higher meaning in Rambaldi's work. Irina wanted to desperately believe that she had not wasted those years in vain.  
  
At times like these she had to keep in mind that everything happened for a reason. She had come to terms with the fact that Sydney wasn't in her life anymore, but it did not mean that she actually liked it one bit. She hated it. She hated the fact that her family had been a tool to bring about a fivehundred year old prophecy.  
  
She would make sure that her family would make it out in one piece and she would start with helping Jack. If she was the one originally responsible for breaking him, she would also be the one to glue him back together. Irina owed him that much. The first step towards achieving that goal would be to tell him the truth about her intentions and about Sydney.  
  
" Jack..." She spoke, inhaling deeply before continuing. "Sydney's gone, but she's not dead."  
  
His reaction to her words were immediate, so unlike a mere moment ago when he had reacted in a completely opposite manner to something she said. She had gotten his attention all right and the only thing that remained was to keep it that way. Irina watched as Jack got up from the couch and made his way towards her. As he got closer she noticed that his suit was looking somewhat crumpled, almost as if he had fallen asleep on the couch before she had arrived and hadn't even bothered to put on something else or freshen up a bit. Her breath quickened as Jack came to a halt in front of her. She had to fight the urge of wanting to pull him close. He looked just too damn sexy for his own good. Unfortunately, now was not the time to make the fantasies and dreams she had been having about the two of them since Panama become a reality.  
  
" How can you know such a thing for sure, Irina? You didn't see what was left of her appartment. You were not there. There were traces of blood, Irina. Her blood. Our daughter's blood." Jack eyes closed as he tried to remember the precise state the appartment had been in when he had found out about Sydney's disappearance.  
  
The neighbours had called the police after hearing gunshots originate from his daughter's appartment and by the time the CIA had finally notified him of the situation, the place had already been crawling with police investigators. He had arrived on the scene just in time to watch Will Tippin being driven away to the nearest hospital by an ambulance, but there had been no sign of Sydney anywhere.  
  
As he opened his eyes again he could read the concern in Irina's eyes. It was only then that he noticed how tired she really looked. Jack wondered what she had been doing after finding out that their daughter had gone missing. Had she known what was going to happen? She had always called him at ungodly hours after sealing their alliance back in Panama, but her calls had suddenly stopped after Sydney's disappearance. He didn't like to admit it, but he had been worried something had happened to Irina. Sloane could have found out about her and tried to have her killed. He could barely handle Sydney being gone and if Sloane had done something to Irina...  
  
He would have hunted the bastard down, tortured him and made him beg for mercy before finally killing him. Jack certainly hadn't shown it, but he had actually been relieved when he had found her standing inside his house.  
  
" That doesn't have to mean anything, Jack. The traces of blood prove nothing. You know this as much as I do. Sydney's still alive," Irina paused as she gazed into his eyes. " Trust me on this, Jack."  
  
" Irina..."  
  
" Please, Jack. I know that given our history it has become difficult for you to trust me, but I know that it is not an impossible thing to ask of you. You need to know that I had no idea that Sloane was going to kidnap you and had switched the Rambaldi artifacts or I would have tried to warn you. I don't know how he found out that I was going to double-cross him. Somehow, he knew."  
  
He reminded himself that he needed to stay focused as he watched her mouth move sensually as she talked. It was getting increasingly difficult to pay attention to what she was exactly saying. Damn it. She was starting to distract him. Her long brown hair fell over her shoulders and onto her black leather jacket. Her black pants fitted her like a second skin. Perfect. The shirt she was wearing was the only piece of clothing that wasn't black, at least as far as those items of clothing he could see with his eyes were concerned.  
  
This was heading the wrong way. Now was not the time to act on his desires. Jack needed control and a large amount of it at that. He would need to quickly distance himself from her or he would not be able to control what was going to happen next. His eyes met with Irina's and he couldn't help but noticing the curious expression that was apparant on her face. Had she noticed? Had his inner dialogue been showing? It was sometimes easy to forget how well they could actually read one another at times and know what the other was feeling or thinking.  
  
Suddenly walking over to the window was as good an option available as any.  
  
Congratulating himself on his move, he started to examine and analyze what she had just told him. Rambaldi and Sloane. A dangerous combination if ever had there been one. The memory of his conversation with Sloane in Mexico resurfaced to bring clarity. " When Sloane was holding me prisoner in Mexico City he would not stop talking about Rambaldi. He kept going on and on about one particular machine Rambaldi had devised. Sloane told me that the construction consisted of forty-seven pieces. He called it..."  
  
" Il Dire," Irina finished softly." That would certainly explain it. Il Dire was Rambaldi's masterpiece. It has started, Jack. There's a change coming and the events that have been set in motion cannot be stopped anymore. At least not by us, but Sydney will be able to stop Sloane."  
  
" Sydney? She's not the one Rambaldi prophesized, Irina. You are," Jack returned.  
  
" No, Jack. That's where you are wrong. Sydney is the one in the prophecy, not me. I...I told her as much the last time I saw her. Jack, you once said that Sloane had a personal connection to Rambaldi. You were right. Sloane believes he was chosen to realize the word of Rambaldi, but Sydney has been chosen as well. She is the only one capable of stopping him."  
  
" This woman here depicted will possess unseen marks. Signs that she will be the one to bring forth my works. Bind them with fury, a burning anger unless prevented at vulgar cost this woman will render the greatest power unto utter desolation," Jack spoke, quoting the prophecy word by word. He frowned as he turned to look out of the window. It had started to rain and he could hear thunder in the distance as lightning flashed across the darkened sky.  
  
" Prophecies are tricky things, Jack." She stated with a sad tone of voice as she buried her hands in her pockets. There had been times where she had cursed the day when she first heard the name of Milo Rambaldi and those times had been more numerous than she would have liked to admit.  
  
" Yes. So, let's assume that someone or something else is meant by the greatest power than the FBI had in mind," He mused as he looked over his shoulder at Irina. The tone of her voice had not been lost on him. Sadness. Rambaldi had been as much of an obsession to her as it had been to Sloane. Her knowledge of Rambaldi was invaluable to their alliance. " Since Sloane believes that he has been chosen to realize the word of Rambaldi he would be much more than just a likely candidate. We must not, however, forget that 'Il Dire'was Rambaldi's master piece. There must have been a reason why he designed such an illaborate machine. In Mexico City Sloane mentioned that he had seen things...seen what's possible. At that point in time I believed that he was somewhat more than just a little delusional. God knows what he exactly saw. Strapped on a bed it was clear that his obsession with Rambaldi had completely taken over his life and Emily's death without a doubt caused this. It sent him off the deep end. A lot of things can be said about Arvin Sloane, but not being devoted to his wife was not one of them."  
  
" Sloane was planning on selling me the Rambaldi artifacts. He wanted out, Jack. He was willing to give it all up for Emily." Irina remembered the conversation she and Jack had onboard the plane on the way back from Bangkok. His words still echoed in the back of her mind.  
  
* We shared a similar unsentimental patriotism... and a devotion to our wives. *  
  
Would Jack ever be able to feel that way about her again? She wanted nothing more badly than that. Her feelings for him had never faltered and her longing for him had intensified during the years they had been separated. She had done all she could to get him to start trusting her again. It would take time, but she had always known as much. Jack was standing with his back turned to her, still staring out of that damned window.  
  
It didn't take long for her to reach him. Five seconds or even less. Who was counting anyway?  
  
Gently touching his shoulder, she made him aware that she was near him. A smile appeared on her face as he turned around to face her. Standing so close to him, she could even smell his cologne. It smelt wonderful...it smelt like Jack.  
  
" Irina, I..." He spoke softly as she placed a finger on his lips and shook her head.  
  
" It's okay, Jack," she replied as she trailed his neck and jaw line with kisses until she had at last reached her final destination. His mouth.  
  
Jack started to return her kisses with even more vigor as he stopped resisting what he had desired to do all along. Their tongues did battle as their lips continued to lock passionately. He had needed this more than he would have ever wanted to admit, but most importantly he needed and wanted her.  
  
" I think we'd better get rid of these things," Irina laughed in between kisses, gesturing at their clothes. She loosened Jack's tie with a swift move and threw it across the room. "That's one..."  
  
"My turn..." Jack replied with a mischievous grin as he removed her black leather jacket and pulled her tightly against him, his erection noticeably rubbing against her. It didn't take long for him get her out of her pullover as he pulled it over her head and threw it to his left where it landed one of his lamps. His eyes moved over her body showing his appreciation. They sparkled as he noticed the colour of her bra. Black. She always did look good in black.  
  
" That's not really fair, Jack," Irina spoke with mock indignation as she got rid of his jacket and ripped his shirt right open, exposing his bare chest. " That's so much better if you ask me..."  
  
" I paid good money for that shirt," Jack sighed as he loosened her bra with one hand, while he pinched her left nipple with the other.  
  
" I'll buy you a new one," A moan escaped from her throat as Jack covered her breasts with kisses and slowly moved downwards. Irina, in the meantime, was wrestling with his belt before managing to pull his pants down. She realized that they would probably end up having sex on the couch if they didn't move elsewhere pretty damn fast. She didn't want the first time after Panama to end with them laying naked and spent on the couch. His bed would be a far more comfortable option. "Jack?"  
  
"Yes?" He asked as he stopped kissing and looked up to her. It was obvious that she wanted to make something clear to him as he was greeted by a warm smile.  
  
"Bedroom." One word was more than enough to make her intentions known to him. One word was all he needed to pick up on her needs. She watched Jack nod as he slowly made his way upwards again, teasing her, planting kisses on her body until he had reached her mouth.  
  
Tugging at the waistband of his boxers, she pulled him towards his bedroom.  
  
*  
  
She opened her eyes and noticed that the bedroom door was wide open and Jack was nowhere to be seen. Where could he possible be? Staring out of the window she could see that the sun had not even risen yet. The sky was still dark outside and the air was filled with the smell of the rain, even though it had stopped a while ago. It was then that she noticed another fragrance originating from where she knew Jack's kitchen was. Good. He had at least prepared some food for himself. She was glad that he finally had decided to go and eat something.  
  
"Irina..."  
  
She turned to look at the door opening and smiled as she saw that Jack was leaning against the door post. He looked more relaxed than he had a couple of hours ago. As his eyes locked with hers, she noticed the twinkle in them.  
  
" Is that for me?" She asked, gesturing at the tray Jack was holding. He nodded as he slowly made his way towards her. Jack was wearing his bathrobe and it looked as if it truly was the only thing he was wearing at the moment. She quickly pulled the bed sheets up to cover her breasts, despite the fact that she knew he didn't mind seeing her naked.  
  
" I was all out of champagne and strawberries," Jack chuckled as he placed the tray on her lap. A smile appeared on her face as she noticed what he had prepared for her. Toast. He had made her toast. Toast instead of strawberries and a glass of orange juice instead of champagne. " Hope you don't mind..."  
  
" I guess this will have to make due then," Irina laughed as she picked up a slice of toast from her plate and took a bite. She briefly reminisced about all the things she could have done with the champagne and strawberries and wondered if Jack was doing the same. Looking at Jack she decided that if he was, he surely wasn't showing it.  
  
Her gaze followed him as he walked to the other side of the bed, discarded his bathrobe and slipped underneath the sheets to join her. A concerned expression flashed across her face.  
  
" Jack...you have eaten something yourself, haven't you?"  
  
"Don't worry, Irina. I'll live to see another day, but thank you for your concern anyway," Jack answered as he watched her eat. He had already eaten before he had prepared an early morning breakfast for her. During the ten years they had been together he had always loved to bring her breakfast on bed. Back in those days they could literally spend endless hours in bed together, doing all sorts of activities. Unfortunately after Sydney had been borne those hours had been considerably shortened.  
  
His gaze wandered downwards until they finally settled upon her breasts. Jack sighed softly as he remembered their night together back in Panama. Who would have thought that after all those they had both still remembered what the other one had liked? It was like time itself had stood still.  
  
Irina smiled as she noted the place on her body where Jack was staring at. She still had a question to ask him about Panama. "Jack...about the transmitter."  
  
"Yes. What about it?"  
  
" My breasts?"  
  
" You did tell me to be creative, Irina. Let's not forget that you agreed to the entire thing in the first place," Jack teased, kissing the spot where the inactive transmitter was still located in between her breasts. " It's not my fault that your associate turned out to be smarter than he looked."  
  
" Shut up, Jack! Sark wouldn't even have found out that I had a transmitter on me if your sub-ordinates had been more careful as to where to park that inconspicuous agency van of theirs," she stated as she slapped his chest. If Sark hadn't seen the tactical team and suspected a bug, the transmitter Jack had injected into her would have still been working. Without the transmitter they had been forced to come up with a new game plan.  
  
Jack shrugged as he played with a strand of her hair. She was right of course. It had been a stupid move and inadvertently compromised the entire plan Irina and he had devised together. After the surviving agents had returned from Stuttgart Jack had berated them for parking the van right in front of the building and made it perfectly clear that if they ever made a mistake like that again he would send them onto missions they might not return back alive from.  
  
Luckily not all had been lost by Sark's discovery of the transmitter.  
  
" Sark's discovery certainly made our arrangement all the more challenging," Irina mused. It had been quite a challenge to get word to Jack without raising Sloane's suspicion. She had taken great pleasure out of creating the opportunities of reaching Jack at the most impossible moments. She loved being able to be creative in finding new avenues of contacting Jack.  
  
"You know me, Jack. I always..."  
  
"...did love to play games," Jack finished for her, remembering what had happened in Bangkok with Shtuka. Sitting at the bar and sipping from his drink he had been amazed by the way Irina had looked in the dress she had been wearing. She had looked absolutely stunning. Distracted by the way Irina had looked he hadn't initially noticed the fourth man and it was only after she had disappeared into Shtuka's private room that he did so. Realizing that Irina might also not have noticed the fourth man, he had gotten up from the bar and pretended to go to the toilet. Jack had reasoned that if Irina succeeded in killing Shtuka and the two other men, the fourth one could still cause her a lot of trouble. At that point he couldn't afford to get her killed. Jack still needed to use her as a means to get to Sloane. He would be the first to admit that her confession in Panama as to what she had intended to do the next morning, had surprised him and thrown him off track. Irina telling him the truth was what had caused him to change strategies at the last moment and work in tandem with her instead.  
  
While Jack had been out there trying to protect her through the means of his new position at the CIA, she had been trying all that she could do to protect Jack and Sydney. Irina had even tried to protect Will Tippin's life, because she knew what he meant to Sydney. Yet, in the end it didn't turn out to be enough.  
  
The truth was that Irina was the one who could save him now, but would he want her to? And more importantly would she even want to save him? The irony of the situation had not been lost on him. The woman who had broken him in the first place was also the one person who had the means to glue him back together again.  
  
He wondered what was going through Irina's mind as he watched her eat the last bit of toast. There was something that was bothering him, something that he needed to hear from her. As she took a sip from the glass of orange juice, he voted in favour of asking her what he wanted to know. This simply could not wait any longer. "Why did you come here, Irina?"  
  
Irina shot Jack a startled look. The possibility of him asking this question had been one of the things preoccupying her beforehand, but it still came as a surprise. He had never asked her about it before. Jack had never once asked it during their secret rendezvous or their phone calls for that matter. Why was he asking her now? Why did the reason for her coming to him matter when it had not done so previously? She took a deep breath before finally starting to talk. " I wanted to make a proposition. We have been working together since Panama, but with Sydney's disappearance I believe it would be better if we changed our current arrangement and common goal. I do not wish to end our alliance, Jack."  
  
Jack nodded. He knew she wasn't lying to him, but she also wasn't telling him everything. There was still something that she was holding back from him. "So what do you propose?"  
  
" Sydney will return to us. It might take a couple of days, months or even years, but she will be back eventually and she will stop Sloane. I suggest that we start working towards helping her fulfill Rambaldi's prophecy. We can't stop Sloane, Jack. However, we can make it easier for Sydney to take him down." Irina carefully studied his features and reached out her hand to gently touch his cheek. A sad smile appeared on Jack's face as he grabbed her hand and placed a kiss on it.  
  
" I know where you're heading with this, Irina and what you're planning is not going to be easy. You do realize this, don't you?"  
  
" Nothing is ever easy. You and I are both experts on that subject, Jack." Irina stated as she picked up the tray from her lap and placed it on the floor.  
  
" Yes..." Jack agreed. They were both living proof of nothing ever being easy in life. If she was planning what he thought she was, it would certainly get her killed. Irina had to realize this as well. She would essentially commit suicide if she went through with it and he wouldn't let her." You won't be able to get close to Sloane, Irina. He wouldn't hesitate to kill you and I don't want to see you dead. There's only an extremely small chance he would let you back in his employment and even if that happened he wouldn't let you out of his sight. You wouldn't get the chance to plot against him, Irina."  
  
" Jack..." She knew what he was thinking about. He was right about Sloane, of course. The bastard did not trust her anymore or he would not have switched the Rambaldi artifacts in Zurich.  
  
"He doesn't trust you anymore, but there is another option available to us. You know as well as I do that it's the best option we've got at the moment. The reason why Sloane didn't kill me back in Mexico was because he still considers us to be friends. This is something we can use to our advantage, Irina."  
  
" Sydney was the reason why you managed to avoid getting caught in Rambaldi and without her..." Irina offered, hoping that Jack would pick up on her train of thoughts. She watched a smile form on Jack's face and knew that, as always her husband would not disappoint her.  
  
" I will have lost my anchor and nothing will be able to prevent me from getting caught up in Rambaldi. Sloane will, in all likelihood, see this as his chance to get me over to his side and use the opportunity to make me understand his vision of what the world should be like," Jack added.  
  
" But there is still the matter of selling your defection over to Sloane, Jack. We have to make as believable and real as possible or it won't work. Sloane is a dangerous man, but he is not stupid."  
  
"His weakness lies within the fact that he still sees me as a friend, Irina. He will try to help me get over the pain of losing Sydney. He knows what happened after I thought that you had died. I got out of control, Irina. I started to drink and took unnecessary risks. It took me a long time to fully recover and by that time the damage to my relationship with Sydney had already been done. If my loss of you caused me to unravel, it wouldn't be that farfetched that the same thing could happen after having lost Sydney."  
  
"After Sloane successfully extracted me...I had asked him how Emily was doing and he told me that the hard part for Emily had been that she was missing those people she had to leave behind. Especially Sydney. He even had the audacity to tell me how much he and Emily had loved Sydney. Loved her like she had been their own. I felt like strangling him right there and then, Jack," Irina spoke, obviously disgusted by the memory of that moment.  
  
" Arvin always had some unhealthy fatherly feelings for Sydney. In a way he tried to take my place as Sydney's father. He always closely followed everything Sydney did and took great pride in her accomplishments. Recruiting her into SD-6 was probably his means of keeping her close and trying to forge a bond. He never knew it at the time, but the very moment I found out that he had recruited Sydney our friendship had officially ended," Jack replied coldly.  
  
" I told him that I saw straight through him, Jack. I told him that he might have needed to think of himself as an honorable husband and a father figure, but I didn't. I would never see that kind of man in him, Jack. The only honorable husband and father figure I know is you and no matter how hard he tries he will never be anything near the man you are. I warned Arvin never to talk about his love for Sydney again..." Irina spoke softly, gazing into Jack's eyes. She wanted to tell him the most important reason for coming to him tonight, but she was afraid that it would turn out to be something he didn't want to hear from her. At least not at this particular moment in time.  
  
Jack's heart froze as he listened to her words. He knew she was trying to make something clear to him without actually saying it, but she was hesitating to voice it to him. If he wanted to hear what it was he would have to repeat the question he had asked her earlier. He pulled her close to him, so she could snuggle up against him. "Why did you come here, Irina? Tell me why you really decided to drop by tonight..."  
  
" I needed to see you, Jack. It's been a while since I last saw you. I missed you...I need you," Irina confessed as she lay her head down to rest on Jack's chest. She wasn't dealing with Sydney's disappearance as well as she thought she would. It had been much harder on her than she had wanted to admit. It hurted, plain and simple. The only person who really knew what she was going through was Jack, because he was going through the exact same thing as she was. " The last time I saw Sydney I told her that my love for her and for you was not a contrivance, Jack. I meant it..."  
  
" You don't have to say this, Irina..." Jack spoke, barely hearable to the human hearing capabilities.  
  
" No, Jack. I do have to say it. This cannot wait any longer. My love for you was not something I had fabricated...it wasn't a lie. It was genuine. You need to know this, Jack. I'm telling you the truth."  
  
" Irina..." Jack warned as his eyes grew dark. The ground started to disappear from under his feet and if she didn't stop he would start to fall. He did not want to fall without there being someone to catch him. Not again. "Don't..."  
  
" Please, Jack. I know that I..." But before Irina could continue, Jack silenced her by trailing the sensitive area of her neck with kisses. A moan escaped from her throat as her hands ran through his hair. She felt herself no longer being able to think straight. That what he was doing to her was maddening in itself. Concentrating on anything other than making love to him had become impossible.  
  
Jack's knee slid in between her legs, creating an opening for him to use. But before he could act out what he had planned for her, Irina made the first move as she used his body to pull herself upwards and forced him to sit on his knees. Jack cupped her ass and as she encircled his waist with her legs Irina slid onto his awaiting erection.  
  
It did not take long for them to quickly start to move in unison and the same rhythm. There had never been any problem in the sex department of their relationship. Not in the past and not even now. They knew exactly what the other one wanted and needed. It was perfect.  
  
Irina's hands trailed down Jack's back as his tongue played teasingly with her nipples. Without as much as looking at each other for confirmation they automatically increased the pacing of their love making until it became too much for them to handle. Irina was the first to come as she screamed Jack's name out loud and Jack joined her shortly after that.  
  
Irina smiled as she wiped the sweat off Jack's forehead. Their breathing was still a bit shallow, but gradually returning to what was considered to be normal. Sliding out of her Jack placed a kiss on top of Irina's head and returned her smile with one of his own.  
  
Tired and spent they lay down on the bed again. Snuggling close to Jack, Irina draped herself over his warm body. She hadn't felt this tired and wonderful at the same time in ages. Irina knew that she wouldn't be able to fight off sleeping for much longer. She also knew that she still needed to say something to Jack before falling asleep.  
  
" I won't ever let you fall again, Jack," She whispered in his ear as she closed her eyes and the world around her became as dark as the night outside.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Fear not the flame of my love's candle  
  
Let it be the sun in your world of darkness  
  
Give unto me all that frightens you  
  
I'll have your nightmares for you  
  
If you sleep soundly  
  
~*~*~* ~  
  
*The End* 


End file.
